i just want to cry. and sleep forever.

I need new friends.

these past two days have been extremely intense. its been hard for me personally having to watch one of the people i look up to so much “die.” it amazes me how a program can have such an impact on a student body, to the kids willing to listen. Mr. Hay has spoken much these past two days and says “we cant just act like nothing has happened. so we can talk about it now.” to have a teacher willing to spend “precious class time” on something other than poetry, in a public school, amazes me. i have been truly been impacted by listening to his words of wisdom, the entire program and the assembly. I was personally touched by Mr. Hay when he took the time after class to ask if i was okay saying that i had had a rough morning being in hysterics for most of the assembly. although i lied and said i was with a smile. he knew i was not. but the fact that a teacher had noticed out of over a hundred students that i was not okay made me feel better. i didnt pour out my frustration and sadness because i knew i would cry more. i dont understand how kids can be so stupid and think this is some game. 

when it comes down to it:

every fifteen minutes, someone dies or is seriously injured by an alcohol related accident.

dont drink and drive.

every fifteen minutes someone dies from an alcohol related car accident. it has become a very emotional high school program.

but not at my school,

at my school it is a joke. kids think its stupid. and the alarm that goes off every fifteen minutes is just an annoying sound that they wish would go away. Immaturity takes over and they all act like assholes who think they are invincible. they think they can talk to their friends who “died” as if its irrelevant.

in reality,

drunk driving isnt a joke. and we are not invincible. it could easily be you in the accident as the driver or as the one who ends up dead. it amazes me that kids have such a lack of respect for real life issues. its not some stupid assembly about sports or STAR testing. its about the risk of your stupidity. your friends may not actually be dead but they easily could be. 

Mr.Hay:

our fifth period teacher. he spoke on his opinion on the program and was on the verge of tears. every student who thought it was a joke had finally shut the hell up. i wish everyone would have heard his speech. it was absolutely phenomenal. i thank him for his willingness to pour his heart out even to the extent to offer his own cell phone number to those who ever were under the influence to call him and he would drop everything to pick them up. he offered this to a bunch of ignorant high school students. i am in awe of him truly.

“you dont understand how precious your life is. you kids are the future and the hope. and i never want to have to look and see myself at one of your memorial services.”

Thank you Mr. Hay. If only every other stupid idiot of a student had heard your speech.

to be as tan as Austin.